10 People You Play Fantasy Football WithAugust 01, 2016 | Leave a Comment
Hopefully this isn't your first year playing fantasy football, but if it is - get ready to meet your leaguemates. If you have played before and can't identify a person in your league with a certain character, you probably are that character.
Call Mission Control: This space cadet can't seem to figure out it's his turn now, and Adrian Peterson was taken 10 picks ago. You might as well draft for him.
Somehow he knows about the one time a QB2/WR3 played together at a camp in college, and totally lit it up. And somehow his prediction that these two will click and launch themselves to QB1/WR1 status by week 3, comes true. He does this every year.
The Unfortunate One
This is generally a commissioner who has run the league for years, but never found a way to win. Each year he puts in solid research, has a strong team, but always drafts the best player to miss 8 weeks of the season and cost him a decent playoff seed. But don't worry; this is gonna be "his year."
This is the guy who knew exactly where he wanted to have his draft. His cheat sheets are covered in wing sauce. He uses his sleeve as a napkin, and his version grazing looks more like feast mode than anything else. Of course when you draft at Wild Wing Cafe, how can you blame him?
You're drafting ninth, but somehow Aaron Rodgers is still on the table. After selecting him, this guy has the next pick. Suddenly he's claiming you made a terrible pick because of Rodgers' performance in a social media video with his girlfriend. He'll say anything to belittle everyone's decision making.
The Envious One
"MAN, I WAS JUST ABOUT TO PICK THAT GUY!" Every. Single. Round.
The Against-the-Grain One
"This is the year, man, Sam Bradford is finally going to be a top 5 QB, I can feel it." This and other sentiments about dramatically underachieving players will follow each of their picks.
The Fluke Champ
For one year, this person looked like an absolute wizard. They forever live in that one glory year. Since going 18-1 and winning the league, they're 5-59.
He drafts Gronk in the first round. Makes sense. Then in the second round, he selects Johnny Manziel. Quickly, everyone realizes this dude is just drafting the all-party team.
The Science Guy
This genius built an algorithm that drafts for him and sets his lineup each week. He's basically a cyborg. He finishes first or second every year. Robots are taking over; not just industry, but fantasy too.
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